I should be writing right now because I know, deep down, it would make me feel better. I want to explain my fears, to share the "what if's" wondering around in my head. But for some reason, the fact that Kai is undergoing major surgery in 6 days has left me speechless. Nothing funny or even vaguely interesting has come to my mind. I'm a one-track girl right now and all I can think of is "have I packed the dilators?" (if you don't know what a dilator is, you don't have a kid with imperforate anus.)
I know this surgery is for the best. I know Kai needs it. I know it will be okay. But honestly, none of those things make this journey any easier. I'm scared and I feel frozen. I want my mommy and that, my friend, is the problem. You see, I am the mommy now. Funny how things change.
5 comments:
Please know I'll be praying for you and for Kai during your trip to Cincinatti! I know I'll be walking in your shoes and you will be in mine in a few short months, and I just truly cannot begin to imagine. My heart aches at the thought of either of my kiddos going through anything so unpleasant. And yet, what a blessing that Kai has a wonderful Mommy and Daddy this time around after his surgery!
Please know we'll be praying for you too! I can't imagine what it must be like, but I guess I will be finding out! Sending cyber hugs your way and praying for peace!
Many prayers for Kai and your family. You know that He is with you every step of the way. HUGS!
I'm here, waiting for you to get here!!!!!!!!! WE can do this!
Oh Heather, somehow I missed this post! It's going to be okay. Kai is in excellent hands, you know that. But it is totally out of your control. You have done everything you can to make sure that he is in the best hands possible. You need to let your fear go and give it to God. Place your trust in Him, because honestly, what other choice do you have?
I will be praying that you are filled with peace about the outcome of what it to come.
XOXOXO
Denise
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